Missing… with Children?

Let’s check our mailbag, which has been hanging low and swinging freely for some time now! Actually, the following plea for assistance came to us not through the usual channels but via email to an address we rarely use for ARGifyin’. We can has internets stalkr plzkthx?

Quoted below, with wanted poster after the jump.

Hi,

I’m sorry, I guess this is a little strange, but I really need your help
- I don’t know who else I can ask!

My friends Martin and Rebecca have been missing for nearly a week now,
and the Police think they’ve been kidnapped. I know that something’s up,
I just don’t know what.

Can you help me?

I look forward to hearing from you,

Jason Thomas (family friend)

www.locatemyfriends.co.uk

Well, golly! It looks like we weren’t the only ones to receive this missive; there’s already a thread about it on Unfiction. That blows our stalker theory out of the water.

Hmm, this missing couple is sort of attractive but if they’re still in the UK, we’re doubting we’ll be going to a lot of trouble to find them. Too bad there’s no sort of incentive like a reward or something.

Hey, wait! If we do find them can we keep them? Maybe we could trade them for four Americans (at the current exchange rate) or three Germans or one really hot Dutch chick or a whole Canadian hockey team. Dang, we might just have to reconsider this level of effort thing.